"Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd." - Voltaire

A friend of mine recently asked me to read over the speech she had written for her application to be the senior speaker at commencement. Unfortunately, it was not selected for the honor, but she had some very good points in it.

The focus of the speech was (loosely speaking): "Maturity means knowing that deviating from your plan is ok."

In it, she spoke of how she had always (from an almost unhealthy age when Sesame Street was still the best way to spend her morning) said that she wanted to go to a top high school, followed by a top college and then straight on to earn her PhD from another top school before slowing down to think about any other options. For her, it didn't work out that way. She got through the top high school and college, and has decided that it's actually in her best interest to work for a year or two before deciding exactly what she wants a PhD in. Finally, she closed with the idea that our job right now might be less to forge full steam ahead into a plan we made years ago, and more to learn to be flexible and show younger people that it's completely ok to be unsure of where you're headed.

The drive to go to grad school is pretty strong at Brandeis, but a lot of people find that when it comes time to sit down and apply, they aren't really sure what they want to do next. For me, I know what my long term goals are, and had always assumed that the only "correct" path for reaching those goals would be to get my PhD as soon as possible and then start looking for companies to work at.

However, once the stack of rejection letters on my desk began to grow, and my email box started filling with recruiting letters from companies I hadn't even dreamed of being able to work for without at least one or two more degrees, my idea of the "correct path" has started to become a little shakey.

As Voltaire says, doubt isn't pleasant, and it's hard not to doubt your plans and goals when faced with a steady stream of rejections. However, I've had a fair amount of time to philosophize on the matter now, and it's occurred to me that fate has a funny way of pushing you in the right direction sometimes. I ended up at Brandeis almost by chance, and it's been a good experience for me. So really, who am I to argue when life tells me that it's not the right time for grad school and throws other opportunities at me about as hard and fast as you'd imagine the Red Sox pitcher doing?

I've been spending the last month or so polishing my resume and my "work" shoes and looking into some of the other opportunities that have presented themselves. Hours of phone interviews and emails with companies on both sides of the country, some initiated by me and some returned calls after companies whose names I know well had contacted me to discuss options. I'm not sure there's anything more flattering to an undergraduate researcher than being contacted and told, "We're aware of your work, and we'd love to talk about employment opportunities."

Interviews have given me a chance to prove to myself how much I have actually learned in the past four years, and a chance to gain confidence in the fact that I actually can pursue careers now that will help me reach the same final goal I had planned on all along without moving directly into grad school.

I have several plans for the next year or two that I am considering, but I can't go into a lot of detail yet because they're not set in stone. But thanks to Voltaire, I can remind myself that it would be somewhat absurd for me to be certain of the future right now. And I keep thinking of the commencement speech I read which will never be heard: deviating from your plans is not only ok, many times it can be a much more fruitful venture.